


John Cho Makes Everything Awesome

by therumjournals



Category: PINTOCRACK
Genre: Crack, M/M, Macros
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-08-10
Updated: 2010-08-10
Packaged: 2017-10-17 22:09:46
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,148
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/181752
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/therumjournals/pseuds/therumjournals





	John Cho Makes Everything Awesome

  


  


***

Chris glanced at Zach out of the corner of his eye and grinned into his popcorn. They were on their first date, and things were going well. Chris had put off this moment for a long time, nervous that he’d do something embarrassing and ruin everything. But then John had asked Zach out for him and now here they were. And so far, Zach seemed to be enjoying himself, even if his hands had stayed stubbornly in his own lap.

“Hey guys!” John whispered, leaning forward in his seat behind them and resting his arms on the back of their chairs. “How’s the date going?”

Chris waited nervously for Zach’s response.

“It’s okay,” Zach whispered back.

“Chris, what about you?”

“Yeah, it’s good. There’s only one thing that could make it better.”

“He’s right,” Zach agreed. “Come on, get in here.” He scooted over a seat and John ignored the hissing disapproval of the other patrons as he climbed over the row to sit between them.

“Hey John,” Zach whispered. “Do you think I should hold Chris’s hand?”

“Oh totally!” John responded. He nudged Chris in the side, and Chris reached across his lap, smiling when Zach’s hand met his, twining their fingers together. The three of them scrunched down comfortably in their seats and grinned at the movie screen.

  


  


***

“Oh god, Chris, fuck, you’re so fucking tight,” Zach groaned, thrusting into Chris with abandon.

“Fuck, Zach, harder, come on, feels so good,” Chris grunted back, pressing back to meet him, his hands clutching at the sheets.

 _buzz buzz buzz_

The next thrust propelled Chris forward enough to grab for the phone on the nightstand. He checked the screen. “Fuck, yes, it’s John,” he panted.

“Awesome! Answer it,” Zach said, picking up speed.

“Hey John! Yeah, he’s here. He’s fucking me into the mattress. It’s awesome. What are you wearing?”

“Put him on speaker!” Zach demanded.

Chris pressed the speaker button and dropped the phone on the bed.

“Hey John,” Zach gasped.

“Hey Zach! Are you close?”

“Ungh, yeah, god,” he moaned, slamming hard into Chris. Chris closed his eyes as he felt heat pooling in his groin. “Come on, John, tell us!”

“Okay, okay...I'm wearing a dark gray suit. Purple tie. Silver cufflinks.”

“Oh FUCK!” Zach yelled, his dick pulsing as he came, shuddering against Chris.

“Chris? Did you come or is Zach going to have to keep reaming your ass all day?” John’s voice said from the speaker.

“I…fuck…okay…nnnnngggh,” Chris wailed as he shot his load across the bed…and the phone. There was a static-y sound and then silence as Zach and Chris collapsed onto the bed.

“John? John, are you there?”

“I think you’re gonna need a new phone.”

***

“Do you, Christopher Whitelaw Pine, take this man, Zachary John Quinto, as your husband?” The justice of the peace raised an eyebrow at John.

“He does.”

“And do you, Zachary John Quinto, take this man, Christopher Whitelaw Pine, to be your husband?”

“He totally does. It’s gonna be awesome.” John turned to face the guests, raised Chris’s and Zach’s hands in his, and the three of them proceeded triumphantly down the aisle.

***

 **TWELVE YEARS LATER**

“John Cho Whitelaw Pine-Quinto, you get your butt back here!!!” Zach yelled, chasing the little terror down and grabbing him by the waist. “Now you either watch this movie with us, or you go to bed, capisce?”

“This movie is DUMB!”

“Star Trek is NOT dumb!” Chris protested from the couch.

“Yes it IS! I want to watch 3D DISNEY PRINCESS SING-ALONG!” Johnny yelled at the top of his lungs.

“We watch that every night. Tonight, we’re watching Star Trek.” Zach plopped him down resolutely on the couch and held him firmly in place.

“Who’s that guy?” Johnny asked, when Sulu appeared on-screen.

“Um…Zach, who was that guy, anyway?”

“I’m not sure…I don’t really remember that much about him…” Zach said, scrunching his brows in concentration.

“Did we ever even hang out with him off-set? It’s all kind of a blur. All I get when I try to remember is a vague sense of awesomeness.”

“Yeah. There was definitely something awesome about him. Did he come to our wedding?”

“I’m not sure. You know, there were so many people... Our wedding was awesome though, so he was probably there.”

“Yeah. Weird.” Chris shrugged and settled back comfortably against Zach. “Pass the popcorn.”

***

 **EPILOGUE**

John watched from a great distance as Zach and Chris sat contentedly on their front porch. Zach reached across the space between their rocking chairs to take Chris’s wrinkled, arthritic hand in his. John smiled.

“You sure did a good job with those two,” Karl observed.

“Yeah, I did, didn’t I?” John said, clasping his hands behind his head and leaning back in satisfaction.

“That was just before you retired, right?”

“Yeah. Decided to quit while I was at the top of my game. Man, I worked miracles with the two of them. You know, after a while it wasn’t even about getting them together any more, just about seeing what I could do.”

“Oh yeah? Like what?”

“Remember that picture of Pine smiling at the paparazzi?”

“No! That was your doing?!”

“Yep,” John said with a smirk.

“Impressive.”

“Ha,” John laughed. “You think _that’s_ impressive?!” He leaned forward conspiratorially and gestured for Karl to slide closer. “I got Zachary fucking Quinto to _shave his hair off_.”

Karl gasped so hard he started choking. “You…you…oh, _John_ , how _could_ you?! I _cried_ when that happened!”

John smirked even harder. “I know. And they thought they were kidding when they said angels wept that day.”

“But John…I heard Zach say it himself…right after he yanked his headband out of Chris’s hand, he yelled, ‘No force on earth _or in Heaven_ could make me cut these glorious locks!’”

John nodded thoughtfully and squinted at Karl. “Did I ever tell you where I was from?”

“You’re…you’re not from here?”

“Oh, I was…a long time ago. I was sent away. And the only way I could regain my place here was to create something so beautiful that nothing could rival it.” John looked thoughtful for a moment. “You know, they almost let me back in after seeing Zach at the 2010 CFDA Fashion Awards,” he mused. “But then they found out that I’d coined the term “Reverse Priest” and it was back to square one. Thus,” he said, making a sweeping gesture toward Zach and Chris on the front porch –“Pinto.”

“It _is_ the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen,” Karl murmured. He glanced at John out of the corner of his eye. “On earth, that is.”

“Oh, I knew what you meant, honey,” John said with a wink. He brushed some dirt off of his lapel and reached over to ruffle Karl’s wings. “I knew exactly what you meant.”

***

  


[   
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[   
](http://s6.photobucket.com/albums/y249/Drunkandinlove/3rd%20Star%20Trek%20Folder/?action=view&current=vy7fid.jpg)

  


  



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